Warm Bed, Heavy Heart

Yesterday evening, as I was walking in Phoenix with my three daughters toward Symphony Hall to see the Nutcracker, I was approached by a woman who was obviously in need. She told me her story and thanked me for not cursing her out. She showed me her pregnant belly and asked for money for food. I never give money for food. I give food. And she needed so much more than food. I was caught off gaurd. I was kind, asked her to protect her baby and gave her $5 in cash trusting God to get me out of the parking garage as I had left my purse at a friend's and only had a little cash my husband had given me for parking. I wanted to take her for a hearty meal. Talk to her about her baby, about her, about the Bread of Life, but I didn't have my wallet, I had my girls with me and we were running late for the Nutcracker which had tickets in our name at will call for another family as well, so I couldn't leave them hanging either.... Layer upon layer. And I knew she was probably lying, that her story wasn't altogether accurate. But I didn't care. I saw her need. I saw her. All evening I kept thinking of what I could have done, wishing I had brought her to the ballet with us, telling her I would take her baby that she wants to give up, wishing I had stopped and prayed with her. As I climbed into my warm bed, so thankful for all I have, I lay wondering if she was warm and if my $5 had gone for a hamburger or for crack. Please pray with me for Aquarius.

Thankfulness

I have been journaling much of my gratitude. I have taken cues from life's circumstances and reflected them back to God. Much of it is so personal it might bore you, but I did want to blog about our time with friends in Utah this Thanksgiving. There was so much laughter between us all! We played games with the adults and the kids, we made food together (several kids joined in...it was lovely), we ate good food together, we stayed up late every night, we shared confidences, joys and struggles, we watched our children play, we met new friends(We love you Sharon, Rachel and Jason!), we enjoyed a parade, Christmas lights, beautiful mountains, the cold, and sitting in front of the fireplace. Sharing life for a week was such a treasure.












CR made these beautiful apple pies, with perfectly flaky crust!
I made the pumpkin ones. :)





Hannah, please forgive me! I did not get one good photo of you! I enjoyed you so much, beautiful girl. :)

Expression

I'm so thankful for the endless ways we can express ourselves, especially with our eyes and faces. God's beauty is so reflected there!

Grace

For several days now I have felt the heaviness of the human condition, of the dangerous road so many of us walk apart from God, of our need for a severe mercy. What will become of us who refuse God's love? What of those who reject God's plans? In this confused and twisted world I find I am desperate for God and the only relief I find is in Him. And I am continually amazed that His response to me is GRACE. Despite all my darknesses, all my depravity, all my weaknesses, He doesn't turn away in disgust. He turns toward me through Christ, with a full-on gaze of love, acceptance, forgiveness and grace. This seems too good to be true. But this, this is the God I love! The One who is better than my reality, whose love is better than all I can dream up, whose plans are greater than my imagination and whose heart is bigger, grander and more beautiful than I can fathom. It's not that it's too good to be true, it's that the Truth IS Love, Perfect Love. I am so deeply grateful for the grace of God.

So Much

Wow. There's so much to be thankful for. I'm thankful to be getting over the flu, thankful for the time I had to read in bed while I was sick :), thankful for my husband who picked up the slack joyfully, thankful to be surrounded (in my home at least) by fall colors and plenty of candles, thankful for my dreaming daughter who wakes up most mornings telling me the most fantastic dreams...this one I've got to tell you! The latest is that she traveled to see friends in Utah BY HERSELF...at the age she is now, she insisted. She went to the beach (hmmm?) with them and had several adventures. She saw a unique flower and asked our friend CR about it. He said it was edible. She realized after she ate it that she forgot to ask what it DID. She grew really tall, like a giant. They played football on the beach and she caught EVERY pass with ease. When she got tired she started to shrink, but when she rested she got bigger again. In her dreams she can do anything: ride a monster truck by herself, make friends with a giant, drive a car, climb mountains. Maybe I should write an illustrated collection of Lily's dreams.



Ann, from Holy Experience encouraged me to set a date of when I'd like to reach my goal of 1000 gifts. I think that's a great idea and have chosen January 30, 2010. That may seem like a long time, but my style is slow and savory! I will likely journal them all, but select my favorites to share. Thanks to all who have read my blog and have encouraged me on gratitude road.

43-ish Gifts and Counting...

Cool weather, planting flowers, fall colors, open windows and doors, a break from school, time with family and friends, cloudy days, happy dogs and fresh produce....these are among the things I am treasuring today. But for the whole week I have been treasuring in my heart the lessons and lives of Abraham and Sarah. I've been reading Genesis and savoring it, trying to fathom the MANY years before Abraham saw some proof of God's promise, being strengthened by their faith, encouraged by God's direct communication with them and validated by their humanity in it all. "Wow" is all I can say. Wow.

Trains, Generosity and Memories

I'm so thankful for the generosity of my parents who treated us all to the Grand Canyon Railway as an early Christmas gift! We took the two hour train up and back to the Canyon, complete with entertainment and a train "robbery!" The kids loved it and I think it will be one of those very special memories with Grandma and Grandpa.